There’s a realisation that comes with time, often through disappointment and unanswered prayers. A realisation that is both grounding and heartbreaking all at once: on this side of earth and eternity, you and I cannot fix or change anything or anyone.
I used to try so hard.
I would reason, explain, over explain, hope harder, pray more, love deeper, believing that if I could just find the right words, be patient enough or faithful enough, things would shift. People would change. Situations would stabilise. Life would finally feel secure.
But it doesn’t work like that.
I’ve had to come to terms with my own limitations, especially as a young woman who longs for stability, something solid to hold onto in a world that feels constantly in motion and out of my control.
I am not God.
And learning that has brought a quiet confidence.
I don’t carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. I’m not responsible for fixing broken hearts, saving relationships or forcing outcomes. That role was never mine to begin with, it belongs to God.
And yet it has hurt to admit that prayer is sometimes the only thing I can do. That I can love deeply and still have to release the outcome. That surrender doesn’t come with guarantees, timelines or explanations.
Trusting God often means sitting in the discomfort of not knowing, watching things unfold slowly or not at all, while resisting the urge to intervene, control or rescue. It asks me to believe that God is working even when I can’t see it and even when I wish He’d hurry up.
There is grief in that.
Grief for the illusion of control.
Grief for the life I thought I could engineer if I just tried hard enough.
But there is also freedom.
Because when I stop trying to be God, I can finally be human. I can pray instead of panic. Hope instead of fix. Rest instead of strive. I can show up faithfully without carrying the impossible burden of outcomes.
So, I am learning, imperfectly, to pray and let God be God. To trust that stability doesn’t come from control but from surrender. And to believe that even in the waiting, even in the uncertainty, I am being held.
What’s your favourite verse that speaks into trusting God?
Many Blessings, Grace. Xx
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